P r e s e n t i n g 

The Journal of Scientific Exploitation

The showpiece publication of our Society is the oft-regarded Journal of Scientific Exploitation, or JSE. In it, we are pleased to present the results of some of our scruplelessly selected research initiatives.

We welcome contributions from all those who share our studiously credulous philosophy. Your name amidst those of our other luminaries can help you achieve the status and recognition you've hitherto been denied by those rigid, close-minded, orthodox scientists with their obstinate obsession with factual evidence.

In order to maintain our exclusive standards, all potential contributors are urged to note the following:
  • The Journal of Scientific Exploitation is a peer-reviewed publication. However, this should not engender any apprehension in our contributors -- even for those whose research is particularly unorthodox -- since critical reviewers and researchers are clearly not among our peers.

  • The articles should be of considerable length and should remain as impenetrable as possible, thereby maximizing the appearance of scientific acumen and respectability while minimizing the possibility that non-specialists or lay-persons will be able to identify procedural or logical flaws.

  • Contributors holding advanced degrees from institutions with impressive- sounding names will receive preferential publishing priority.

  • Titles of submissions should be a decaword or more in length and ideally will include several polysyllabic quasi-scientific technical terms.

  • Contributors are expected to strenuously assert that they are thorough, rigorous, open-minded, and even skeptical. This is essential to maintain the proper air of academic detachment. However, in order to keep from skewing the results of our on-going research, actual skepticism is strongly discouraged (see The Secret of the SSE).

  • Critical rejoinders are welcome. However, due to constraints in our operating budget and the ever-increasing demands for space in the JSE, we must unfortunately limit the length of such submissions to three lines.

  • We are an equal-opportunity organization: any prior affiliation with discredited or fraudulent research poses no obstacle to publication, and we assure absolute confidentiality, as our readers -- being above idle gossip -- will surely have no interest in any historical unpleasantness. We pride ourselves in being open to absolutely anyone!

Recent articles in the Journal of Scientific Exploitation

 

Scientific Panel Concludes Some UFOs are Not Extraterrestrial Spacecraft

 

 

Voodoo Death Rituals: Is There a Bright Side?

 

 

Breakthrough Technologies in Privacy from Remote Viewing

 

 

Highly Localized Stimulation of Causal Anomalies: A Study of Invariant VCR Recording Failures During Alien Abductions

 

 

Graphological Analysis of the Nazca Lines

 

 

Can the Vacuum Be Engineered for Abstergent Applications? The Theories of Staub Gebläse of the Hoover PhysikInstitut

 

 

Dowsing in Desert Ecosystems: Eight Sigma Results Confirmed (in Antarctica)

 

 

Apparent Association Between Effect Size in Anomalous Cognition Experiments and Experimenter Credulity

 

 

Crop Circles: The Braille of the Gods?

 

 

Implications of Residual Excreta of Canis firesignis Discovered Proximate to Roswell Crash Site -- Did Dogs Fly Spaceships?

 

 

Cattle Mutilation: A Culturally Unbiased Analysis of Zoophagous Aspects of Alien Zoophilia

 

 

The Critical Role of Calculated Inattention by Experimenters in Parapsychological Research

 

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